Monday, August 20, 2012

Jewish Humour: Jewish-Christian Relations


Monday Humor


Much of the Jewish humour on this site can be found in this wonderful book: The Encyclopedia of Jewish Humor, compiled and edited by Henry D. Spalding.
This week's humour is focused on Jewish-Christian relations

A minister told his friend Rabbi Goldman, "Last night, I dreamed of the Jewish Heaven. It was a slum, and it was overflowing with people — running, playing, talking, sitting — doing all sorts of things. But the dream, and the noise, was so terrific that I woke up."

The rabbi said, "Really? Last night, I dreamed of the Protestant Heaven. It was a nice, proper suburb, with neatly trimmed lawns, and houses all neatly lined up."

"And how did the people behave?" asked the minister.

"What people?"

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A Jew and a Christian were arguing about the ways of their religion.

The Jewish man said, "You people have been taking things from us for thousands of years; The Ten Commandments, for instance." 

The Christian replied, "Well, it's true that we took the Ten Commandments from you, but you can't actually say that we've kept them!"

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In a small village in the Poland, a terrifying rumor was spreading: a Christian girl had been found murdered.

Fearing retaliation, the Jewish community gathered in the shul to plan whatever defensive actions were possible under the circumstances.

Just as the emergency meeting was being called to order, in ran the president of the synagogue, out of breath and all excited. "Brothers," he cried out, "I have wonderful news! The murdered girl is Jewish!"